Dick came bustling into the office, found me, and said "I don't know what happened, I just left for a minute and when I came back my yearbooks were gone". I glared at him, trying not to explode. He had lost the yearbooks for half his class. That was my first real encounter with Dick.
One thing about starting out that way with someone there is really only one way for things to go between the two of you. Over time things got much better between us. I was the teachers association representative at the high school and that meant I had contact with Dick during the year, as he was a member of the association.
I learned some about Dicks background as we got better acquainted. He had been the building representative in his school in California, decided to become a Mormon and move to Utah. He had, as one of our co-workers said, a hair trigger ready to go off any minute. I saw that in Dick several times.
I sat in some computer training with Dick and others one day early in the computer era at our school. He and one of his friends said they were not coming back after lunch, since the training wasn't teaching them anything. I told them to come back after lunch, they would like what we were going to do. We were going to learn how to get on, and use, the Internet. They came back and they stayed all afternoon. When I was able to show them how to get onto the Kelly Blue book site, and check out car values, Dick and his friend were convinced the Internet had merit.
More time passed and Dicks marriage fell apart. He was lonely and heartbroken. He came to my office on many days after school and we talked until we were the last ones in the building. It gave us a chance to learn more about each other and we sometimes talked financial matters, and I started doing tax work for Dick. We also talked about computers a lot. Dick was fascinated by them and their abilities. I bought a laptop one year and soon Dick had to have one. A month later he asked me to help him with it. He brought it to school and it was still in the unopened box. We got it up and going for him and he just kept being so delighted by what it could do. Whenever I went to see him in his room after school he was on the computer.
Dick and I worked the down markers for the Thursday afternoon football games for several years together and continued our after school chats. He told me in of those conversations that he and his wife were going to get back together after 9 years of separation. He seemed very happy, but unfortunately, he wasn't happy for long and in 3 years he was separated again. This time they both knew it wasn't workable and got divorced. I was glad they did. I had listened to too much unhappy talk from Dick to think he could ever be happy in that marriage. He found a condo he liked and started his life alone again. He didn't like it, and he tried online dating sites with some success.
By this time I had retired and so had Dick. We started going to lunch on occasion and would always talk for two hours. I watched his hair trigger disappear after he finally got divorced and retired. He started looking inward often. He admitted he had been a real piece of work in his first marriage, and didn't know why his wife had stayed as long as she did before taking their young son and leaving town.
We got to be incredibly close friends. Dick shared his feelings about life every time we met. He talked about his son Matt and how accomplished he was. Dick wanted more contact with him and his family. He loved his grand kids and talked about them at our every meeting.
He couldn't stand being alone and got feeling blue when he was without a female companion. I think he fell for each lady he met very fast and that made the breakups hard. But he started being more philosophical about them over time.
We started trying to meet for breakfast every week. I would show Dick my travel pictures, and he was so effusive in his praise. When I showed him the photos I took at the Custer battlefield he looked at each one talked in detail about it and what had happened in the picture. He had visited there and was enthralled with the battlefield. He had been to Gettysburg and when I finally visited there and showed him my pictures it was another chance for him to retell the story of the battle there. I loved talking about history with Dick. He had such an inquisitive mind about it, as he did with computers. He had a childlike awe with electronics. I was lucky enough to be called his tax, investment, and computer guru. At times a mixed blessing.
By the time Dicks body was discovered in his condo, one day in June of last year, we had forged a bond I have never had with another friend. Dick was so appreciative of everything I did for him, he had become a much more calm, understanding person, he was the most honest person I have ever known, and cared deeply about those less fortunate than him. He lived in a very compact condo, did not live a fancy lifestyle, and yet every time I saw him or talked to him he was always so thankful for what he had, for the comfortable life he lived. He always compared it to what his parents had.
I miss Dick, his quick wit, his appreciation of the world, his just childlike awe of the workings of God. He was struggling with staying active as a Mormon or reverting to his Catholicism. We talked of that at great length, and he always encouraged my church activity.
Everyone deserves a friend like Dick. He was the most receptive to differing points of view on political issues than anyone I have ever met. And that was part of the transformation I saw in him over the last half dozen years. From a fire breathing ex football player, who was, as he put it ready to kick your ass, to a very thoughtful older man who understood the need for compassion and understanding between human beings. He especially came to want to be closer to his son, daughter-in-law, and his grand kids.
Dick taught me much about how to see and appreciate the world. His loyalty, insights, his light heartedness with waitresses, his passion for baseball. As I turned his TV off the day he was found, I was sure he had been watching baseball. All of these were part of the guy I looked forward to meeting each week. For Dicks incredible friendship I will always be grateful.
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